Mercury Retrograde Strikes Again

Mercury is going direct, finally, on June 3rd and not a moment too soon! If I can help it, I try to avoid signing new leases, having a carpenter come over to begin a new project, having a contractor pave our streets, or a daughter begin rehearsals on a very important one woman show she’s performing in NYC this summer.

You’d think having a resident astrologer on board would prevent all calamities from occurring…NOT!!! That’s because I’m the town crier 3-4 times per year when mercury retrograde takes to its sickbed. I was yelling through the streets urging all to thoroughly research, plan, to look before leaping, and expect delays, setbacks and re-dos of whatever it is you’ve haphazardly done before. Allow me to introduce myself: I’m the astrologer who cries wolf to a legion of fans who roll eyes at me. “No not this retrograde thingie again!… I’ve heard that before… and before… and before.”

And, you’ll hear it again because mercury retrograde is one of those red flags that wave in your face and cause you to trip on a crack that needs fixing. It’s a backwards trickster this mercury retrograde and you’d best pay heed.

First case in point: My husband had my brother-in-law pop by for a sleepover yesterday with ulterior motives to utilize his unparalleled carpentry skills to beautify our wall. “All you gotta do is slap on a simple rock board before we add the stone—nothing to it for a master carpenter like you… come on over for dinner, movies, and don’t forget your saw and tool kit!”

“But it’s mercury retrograde,” I whispered to my husband. “It’s just a simple job,” he replied. “Really… what could go wrong?”

Fast forward 3 hours. My hilariously funny and talented brother-in-law already hard at work on the task, sharing humorous family anecdotes, most of them involving his mom. We were all having a pretty good time, his job nearly complete—just one final screw… A funny look came over him. “Well… that didn’t feel right.”

He ordered my husband to quickly run upstairs and flush the toilet, and as the whoosh sounded, another whoosh echoed downstairs as water trickled through a brand new hole in our pipe! A trip to Home Depot and the gaping problem was soon fixed. If only my husband heeded my warning.

Second case in point: My daughter’s friend needed a place to sublet for a month. She knew the area she wanted and jumped at the very first place she saw. “But it’s mercury retrograde, I whispered to my daughter. Tell her to research carefully, know all there is to know before signing.” But it was already too late. My daughter’s friend handed over $1,000 to a property manager who refused to show her the place—not even a virtual tour! She later had a bad feeling in the pit of her stomach, unrelated to the taco dinner she’d just eaten. You know… that rancid knowing you’ve just been robbed eating away at your lower intestines. She tracked down the manager of the building and was told this property manager had nothing to do with their apartment building. In fact, the apartment she paid for was already rented and people had been living there for several months already. Snookered by the winged messenger. But my daughter, a sweet natured gal, invited her to stay with her till she got back on her feet.

Final case in point: My development was due for a new pavement, contractors were hired and ready to start work immediately. “But it’s Mercury retrograde,” I whispered to the president of the board, who looked at me like she was ready to burn me at the stake! The pavers came and not once, but twice, they hit the main water line and we lost our water, which always makes one extra thirsty and affects the speaking voice (a mercury thing), which brings me to my daughter completely losing her voice during a crucial time of play rehearsals. Speaking of my daughter, she lost power at work as smoke filled the building when a rat gnawed through something electrical and imploded!

And on that dramatic note, I’m going to pull down the shades and crawl into bed till mercury goes direct on June 3rd. I suggest you do the same!—lol. But seriously, keep doing deals, contract workers, buy new things, just do so very carefully. The extra caution plus a good exterminator can prevent a potential rodent from imploding in your building.

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